The good guy

The world seems to be spinning... Am I drunk? No, I don't think so. Well, maybe I drank a little but I sure am not drunk but rather dizzy for a little bit. Why did I drink when I'm not normally compatible with alcohol? The thought just passed by me. Why not? A little drinking might not be bad. Just wanna try out! Now that's definitely gonna destroy my "Nice Guy" image. Yeah right, as if I am a nice guy.

Well, that's what a few thinks of me a few years back. I would hear from my parents that my elementary or high school teachers would say that I am such a good boy who doesn't know how to be bad. And when they catch me red-handed or blamed to be doing wrong deeds, they start their hour-long sermons with, "And here I thought you are a good guy." as if it was my fault that they judged me the way they did. That may be true, however, no one (I believe) can be the NICE GUY always. When they are trapped in a corner, everyone becomes as savage as a bear, as cunning as the cat family (the big ones), and as brutal as man can ever be. Why can't he? Its the law of nature after all. The strong shall live and the weak shall die.

What's wrong with being a nice guy? There's got to be a lot. One of them would be that all the best things in life are taken by the bad guys. The nice guys only get appreciation of their goodness and nothing more than that. The good guys always gets what the bad guys are supposed to deserve. The good guys gets the worst, and the other gets all the good stuff. Now, who wants that?

These may be true but what I feel bothers me.Why do I keep on doing things that doesn't benefit me in any way? Why do I stay up late to work on programs that aren't mine? Why do I go to class late just to make sure that I have done what I'm supposed to do? Why do I spend my money on food that doesn't go to my stomach?

Maybe, just maybe, I just want to be the good guy after all.